Tuesday, 1 December 2009

I am so pissed off with Brazil today!


I am so pissed off with Brazil today!

Not for myself, but I'm sick to the back teeth of my Brazilian girlfriend being shafted by unscrupulous people.

Firstly, there's the situation with her former employer who didn't pay her for 6 months - she still hasn't received a centavo. An audience with the Justicia de Trabalho was fixed for 25th Nov... we attended... but the admin staff were on strike and it was rescheduled for 24th March - FOUR MONTHS AWAY!

Now we've had mega problems with a driving school.

Alice signed up for lessons on 15th December 2008. She passed the pysch test OK and absolutely flew through the theoretical test with the highest score they'd seen.
Then came the practical lessons. She started those but the instructor was very unreliable, would cancel lessons at short notice and lessons were never the full hour. However she persevered.

We continually asked the instructor to organise the driving test, but the bitch always put it off. Finally it turned out that Detran had suspended the school and she had been teaching illegally. A test was organised, but we had to transfer driving schools. Stupid illogical Brazilian bureaucracy makes it very difficult to change schools.

The bitch said we needed to pay R$100 via her to the other school, which we did. She also said it would cost R$50 to rent the car from the other school. It was arranged that we would arrive early so that my gf could practice for a while in the different car (I certainly wouldn't attempt a driving test without first having a chance to get accustomed to the clutch - and I've thirty years' driving experience).

We arrived at the test centre at 0600 as arranged - the car from the other school arrived at 0700. He had no knowledge of the pre-arranged lesson, and we discovered the boss of the new school had not asked for money, nor received it! The only money required was R$50 fpr the car rental which we had previously paid to the bitch. We paid another R$50 to him (as he hadn't received the first paymen)t.

Alice was very stressed and tearful. She was so upset she didn't even attempt the test (which I can understand, as the replacement car was much newer and had a decent clutch, whereas she'd been learning in a car with a stiff clutch). Her confidence was shot by this time.

We went to Detran afterwards to try and organise a new test, but because of the bitch's illegal activiy and dragging her heels about organising the test, Alice missed the deadline by 1 day for a re-test and needs to take all the courses again (psych, theory, and practical). We're seriously considering buying a licence for her.

I honestly don't know how so many Brazilians can sleep at night knowing that they're mindf-ing other people, let alone taking money under false pretences.

It's not surprising that I feel like punching somebody's lights out!

I DO like Brazil but at times it's a backward vipers nest. People think nothing of sh*tting on others, and there seems to be little legal redress. They need to sort themselves out... the old adage "Brazil is a country of the future, and always will be" certainly seems to ring true. They need their own Maggie Thatcher - I may not have liked the woman but she had the guts to sort the UK out. But I doubt very much there's a Brazilian politician with big enough balls to take on that job!

Wednesday, 21 October 2009

Top 10 Sexiest (according to Brazilians)




Confira a lista das 10 mais sexy pela revista: VIP
Grazi Massafera
Juliana Paes
Scarlett Johansson
Ana Hickmann
Sandy
Claudia Leite
Emma Watson
Iris Stefanelli
Ivete Sangalo
Anahí

Obviously very Brazilian biased - as most middle class Brazilians I know do have Sky TV (and therefore access to US/UK programmes) and even terrestrial Brazilian TV shows Hollywood movies, I would have expected more international stars.

And how does Emma Watson get on the list? Ok - she's kinda cute maybe in a Potteresque way (now that's she's not a child but a young woman), but one of the top ten sexiest? Never.

Scarlet Johansson is the only one that should be a no-brainer for this list. Have Brazilians never heard of Jessica Alba, Megan Fox, Angelina Jolie, Halle Berry, or even Salvador's very own Adriana Lima?

Plus - maybe it's just me - but I don't find Ivete Sangalo particularly sexy!

held up in traffic (kind of)...

Today I was driving along the service road approaching the Elevador Lacerda taking minha esposa, Alice, to the district of Comercio in Salvador.

I had to stop just before the Elevador (as the two cars in front of me had stopped). Then Alice pointed out that there was a middle-aged guy holding a sub-machine gun by the roadside. Nobody in the vicinity seemed in the least concerned. I then noticed two other younger guys hovering around, each with an automatic pistol in their hand.

The middle-aged guy was dressed in jeans and a wine coloured shirt. The two younger guys were in jeans and T-shirts.

The "gunmen" were very calm and not at all agitated - and there were members of the public standing only a few feet away at the bus stop, along with pedestrians walking past unperturbed.

I think they may have been Policia Civil (due to their demeanour) rather than preparing a robbery, but it surprised me that if they were cops that no-one was keeping innocent bystanders out of potential harm's way.

Even after nearly three years here, I find this kind of scenario somewhat unsettling. I guess I always will.

Wednesday, 14 October 2009

Shit happens - even on Morro São Paulo


Here you see a photo of Leo, Alice, myself, and Vivi on the island of Morro são Paulo.

And in the background you can see the view that we were treated to for 20 hours between about 5 pm Saturday and 1pm Sunday.

Blackness!

The plan was to spend the long holiday week-end sun-bathing and sampling caiparinhas and cervejas in the bars and barracas.

The reality was rain on Saturday and a subsequent 20 hour power failure.

A few bars were open using candle-light for illumination, and the streets were relatively crowded with people trying to occupy themselves walking around by the light of their mobile phone screens. But it was impossible to miss all the puddles that had been left behind after the rain.

We had tickets for a party that night, which involved a slightly perilous trek along unlit pathways to the venue. A crowd had already formed but the party venue was closed - the only official presence was two policemen, assumedly to control the crowds, but in reality cowering under a tree to shelter from the renewed rainfall.

Abandoning the proposed evening's entertainment we decided to go back to the pousada. However sleep was hard to come by... no ventilation meant a warm environment and also a mosquito that kept buzzing round my ears.

Fortunately Sunday's daylight brought respite and allowed us to enjoy the village's barracas and bars again. And after a lot of running around (literally in the case of Leo and myself) we managed to get a refund on our party tickets.

The only way to deal with things like this is to put them down to experience.... so we did!

Saturday, 3 October 2009

New Hairstyle...

No - not my new hairstyle.... my hair is still the same!

Alice has a new hairstyle; she's had it braided.

Whilst I was all for her having her hair braided (it looks really sexy) I was a bit worried when I saw that she was going to have a reddish-brown colour mixed in with her natural colour.

I needn't have worried though.... the results are fantastic. See for yourself...






Rio gets the Olympics!!!! Parabens!!!


Rio has been chosen for the 2016 Olympics.


Of course it all depends upon what survey you read but there's no denying that many cities in Brazil can be considered somewhat dangerous.


According to the 2009 RealClearWorld survey of the most dangerous cities, for violence Rio comes in at number 6, behind Detroit, Caracas (Venezuela), Cuidad Juarez (Mexico), Linfin (China) is actually no.3 but that's for its dangerously toxic air and Mogadishu comes in at no. 1. However the dangers should be taken in context.


I live in the poor north-east of Brazil, where the reasonably well-off are outnumbered by the poor in a ratio of 1:5. However, I don't feel it to be a frightening place. Any violence is 99% of the between criminals or police and the criminals. You do get the occasional tourist mugging (usually non-violent if the tourist uses his brain and doesn't resist) but to be quite honest that can happen anywhere in the world. I have had my pocket picked once - the thief got away with R$2 (about 60p) I've visited Rio twice and again didn't sense a threatening air.


Of course security will be visibly stepped up during these events. As in other Brazilian cities the violence tends to be somewhat restricted to the criminal fringes. If it werre too terrifying a place it would not be visited by holidaymakers in the numbers that it is.


I sincerely hope that Brazil and Rio will take this opportunity to really crack down on crime and improve its image abroad. It'll be a tough job, but the rewards are potentially immense.

What Brazilian team to support?



I thought it's about time I picked a Brazilian team to support. I didn't fancy either of the two local teams Vitoria or Bahia, and then I heard about Tottenham's strategic partnership with Brazilian club Sport Club Internacional from Porto Alegre.



Suddenly I didn't have a problem anymore - if Internacional are good enough for Spurs, they're good enough for me! (Actually, they're quite a successful outfit). Unfortunately Porto Alegre is 1430 miles away from Salvador, so I won't be going to see them play anytime soon - TV will have to do. I also have to decide how to break this news to one of my students - he supports Porto Alegre's other team, Gremio.




Of course, if Spurs ever play Internacional I'll still be rooting for the boys in white & blue!